Keep Momming

I participated in a campaign on behalf of Mom Central Consulting (#MC) for Shire. I received a promotional item as a thank you for participating.

The relationship that exists between mothers and daughters is unlike any other. It has many unique moments, memories, and yes, even challenges along the way. The relationship dynamic can be even trickier when your daughter is in those tween-age years. What can be even more difficult is when some people dismiss certain behaviors as “typical tween girl behavior” when those behaviors can be symptoms of something more serious. Research suggests that girls are more likely than boys to report having mostly inattentive Attention- Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) symptoms. Since inattentive symptoms can be less noticeable than hyperactive and impulsive symptoms, it is important that moms know what to look for.


I’m proud to be joining forces with Shire, CHADD and Holly Robinson Peete to announce the launch of keep momming, a new public service initiative geared towards the moms of tween girls to raise awareness of ADHD.


The campaign is anchored within a new digital hub, KeepMomming.com, where you’ll find tips, tools and other go-to resources for moms, including a checklist to help recognize the symptoms of ADHD – inattention, impulsivity, and hyperactivity – and then encourages moms to talk to their daughter’s doctor. The keep momming initiative can help moms learn about ADHD and provide ideas on how to spark a conversation and stay connected with their tween.


Don’t miss Holly’s message about the keep momming initiative http://goo.gl/3tqd5q, and be sure to check out the website at KeepMomming.com.

{Guest Post} Finding Out Your Child has an Anxiety Disorder

A huge thank you from Becky at Midwest Cornfed Mom for providing this amazing guest post.  It is one that touched my heart, since I've dealt with anxiety issues since I was a child.  Be sure to visit her blog and give her some extra love!

When you look at my five year old, you see a normal little boy with scraped knees, dirty hands, and a cheesy smile. You’d never guess that he suffers from lives with severe anxiety, but he does. WE do.

For years we have dealt with his “nervous habits”. Biting his nails, clearing his throat, clinging to our leg when we would go out in public.  Things you can easily shrug off as normal childhood behavior. Then he went to Kindergarten and his behavior changed. He started complaining daily of headaches, stomachaches, and leg pain.  He would take over an hour to fall asleep at night. We told him he was fine, there was nothing wrong with him. He would wake in the night, climb in our bed, and tell us he had a bad dream. Dreams of things that would frighten anyone (tornadoes, sharks, storms, war, etc.) He told us his “head wouldn't leave him alone”.  He acted out, and he would do things that were socially inappropriate. He became mean and hateful, hitting us and his baby brother, throwing things, etc. We disciplined him, took away toys, privileges, you name it. But nothing affected him.

After one semester of school, we reached out to his physician thinking he had ADHD. Imagine our surprise when the physician said he had severe childhood anxiety. To put it into perspective, on the scoring of his anxiety questionnaire, a score that would indicate anxiety would be 25….Carson’s score was 54….Fifty. Four.  My stomach sank when I heard those words from his doctor. He was started on medication (“off label use”) and we slowly saw improvement. Once he was able to sleep and his head was clear, he slowly became our sweet little boy again. However, the improvement wasn't until after he had already damaged social relationships, and after we had been labeled as “bad parents” by other parents in our son’s school.

So why am I telling you all this?  So that you can know the signs of anxiety and maybe be more understanding of other parents and their child’s behavior, or even of your own child’s behavior.  While worrying is normal to a degree, sometimes it is more than just worrying.


Here are some red flags that may indicate your child needs to be evaluated.

1)  Easily agitated or overly stressed in a normally stressful situation.  Perhaps it’s a performance at school and they are stressed over the need to be perfect, so they act out with aggression and agitation toward others. Or they act out by trying to be funny to ease the attention on themselves.

2) Recurrent sleep disturbances. Sleep deprivation can cause children to act irrationally, be hateful, overly emotional.  They may wake in the middle of the night, have nightmares, have difficulty falling asleep, or have a fear of sleeping alone.

3) Irrational fears of “something bad” happening or the “what ifs”.  They may question repeatedly what would happen if a tornado came, or the building caught on fire, or if the car ran off the road. Even though you just told them yesterday, or even today, that these things were highly unlikely, they still question you about it.

4) Physical symptoms.  Recurrent complaint of headaches, muscle aches, abdominal pain, or restlessness are just some of the physical symptoms.  Anxiety can become so overbearing that your child actually does feel pain when there’s no logical reason or physical injury to cause it.

5) Perfectionism.  They must have everything perfect or they have to start over. They can’t be interrupted from a task to move on to something else until the first task is completed.  They are overly critical of everything they do.


If your child has any of the above symptoms, perhaps you should consider talking with your child’s physician about him or her. Don’t assume that a child acting up is because of a bad parent or a bratty child. There may be more to it that you don’t know.  After all, looking at my son, you would think he’s a normal little boy. You’d never guess that his behavior problems are simply him trying to make himself feel comfortable in an uncomfortable situation.

Recognizing ADD/ADHD in Young Girls

"She's so smart, I just wish she would try a little harder..."

"She's been disruptive, always wanting to play with her friends instead of paying attention."

"She keeps losing her homework, after we spent an hour working on it the night before."

"She seems to zone out, and daydreams during class to the point where we aren't sure if she's even listening."

These are just some of the things that we've been hearing for the last couple of months, and then the teacher finally called us in for a parent-teacher conference.  My step-daughter, who's 7 years old, has been disruptive, failing assignments, and completely disregarding authority.  It isn't just at school either.  Here at home, she's been forgetful, defiant, and, well, a brat.  I hate to put it in such a harsh way, but something has to give.  It's been a nightmare trying to relate to her lately, and getting her to follow directions has been nearly impossible.

I'll give you an example.  Every night at 7:30, I tell her to put on her pajamas and brush her teeth.  Bedtime is at 8 (we get up early and kids need sleep) so I give her half an hour to wind down and realize it's time to go to bed.  So, she'll go in her room, and ten minutes later come back out with pajamas on.  Without brushing her teeth.  "I forgot," she'll say.  Really?? In ten minutes time, you forgot to do one of the two things I told you to do?  "I was playing."  Ugh!

She's so easily distracted that we often have to remind her to eat during supper, because she'll drift off into daydream world and forget what she was doing.

We've tried counseling.  We've tried rigorous schedules.  I think it's time to seek profession (medical) help to see if there is an underlying problem.

That's why I've written this post.  Our thoughts are leaning toward ADD/ADHD but have hard such a hard time finding a diagnosis because girls do not exhibit the classic signs quite like boys do.  Here's a list of what to look for if you think your daughter may have an attention disorder (note: I'm not a medical professional and am just sharing what I've learned along the way.  If you have questions, please consult your child's pediatrician):