Monday, May 20, 2013

My Birth Story

I never did write a birth story when I had my first little guy, and now 5 weeks after little miss Kaya arrives I'm finally sitting down to tell of my experience.  Not that it was extraordinary or warrants any certain recognition, but as any mom can tell you - giving birth is special, magical, and different.  So here's my story:

My due date wasn't until May 9th.  Because my first baby was a little early, I figured Kaya would probably make her grand debut a couple of weeks early as well.  What I wasn't expecting were the contractions to start 5 weeks early.  At my normal checkup at 8 months, my doctor informed me that I was already dilated 4cm and because of my shortened cervix he wanted me to take it easy, rest as much as possible, and no lifting.  Easy for him to say, he doesn't have a clingy two-year old!  But, I did as he said and basically spent all my time resting as much as possible.

The morning of April 13th, I knew it wasn't going to be long before my little girl decided to come out.  I had a restless night full of fairly strong contractions, and was just uncomfortable in general.  I called my sister to have her go grocery shopping with me, I knew Sammy was going to need milk and we were out of the basics.  About 15 minutes walking through the store, and I couldn't take any more.  I went home and laid down, trying to relax and hoping that I wasn't actually going into labor.  Nevertheless, I told my mom to get ready, as well as got a babysitter lined up for Sammy.  When Matt got home from work, I let him know that we were probably going to be bringing home the little one sooner than we thought.

It was almost 11:00 when I got to the hospital because I had to wait on my mom and my sister.  Once there though, the contractions were steadily getting worse - closer and stronger.  The nurse checked my cervix, decided that I was a "solid 6" and started the necessary steps to get everything going.  After starting my IV, having the lab technician come draw my blood for the tests I had to have before they could do the epidural, and working on all the other details of what needed to be done, my nurse told me that she was hurrying as fast as she could to make sure I got the epidural before it was too late.

Now, don't think I am a horrible mother for wanting to expose my daughter to drugs.  I am a total wimp when it comes to pain and I honestly didn't think I would be able to handle childbirth without an epidural.  With my first baby, I had a slow labor and was given Stadol and an epidural.  It still hurt!  Of course I was going to ask for the epidural again.

Not what Kaya had planned, however.  My contractions were so strong and painful that I couldn't sit or lay down.  I paced the delivery room, bending over and whimpering with each one.  Matt was so awesome, rubbing my back as each contraction got worse.  My mom asked me if I needed her to call the nurse in to check me again and I told her no; I wasn't ready yet.  Then the pressure started and I felt like I needed to push.  This was at midnight, a short hour after I got to the hospital.  The nurse came in and checked - I was at 9cm...  Too late for an epidural or anything for pain, and time to call the doctor in.

A quick call to the doctor and he was there within 15 minutes, breaking my water and telling me to push.  I felt miss Kaya force her way into the birth canal and pushed each time the nurses told me to.  Then the contractions stopped.  Kaya's head was almost to the opening, sunny-side up, and my body thought I wasn't in labor anymore.  There was nothing I could do, but lay there helpless as the worried looks on the doctor's and nurses' faces told me something was wrong.  Kaya's blood pressure was dropping and she was in distress.  My doctor decided that an episiotomy was the best way to go, and once there was room for my baby's head to come out, he had me start pushing again.  Two short pushes later and I was a mother again, of a beautiful baby girl.

4 lbs 14 ounces, 18.5 inches long - born at 1:11am on 4/14.


Sunday, January 13, 2013

Present Moment


Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.   -Buddah

Life as a stay-at-home momma is mundane, stagnant, unchanging.  Yet it seems like when you look back, nothing is the same.  Day to day, the routine is almost suffocating in its monotony but the rewards are priceless.  The kicks in my belly from the life I have growing inside me, the kisses from a sleepy toddler…  You may lose the self you once had before children, before “domesticating,” yet what you gain is so much more.
That quote from Buddah reminds me of a good one from Kung Fu Panda:
"Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called the 'present'" 

So I vow to live in the moment.  To take each day as it is given to me and to try and make the best of it, regardless of my situation.  

Wednesday, January 2, 2013

Resolutions

It seems that every year I'll think of a few things that I would like to change about myself, about my life.  I'll ponder it for a few days, and then procrastination sets in and nothing changes.  It's caused me to become stagnant, never-changing.  This year I decided I will make actual resolutions, and deadlines.

First of all,  I vow to procrastinate less.  This has been my downfall, for why do now what you can put off until later?  This is why I haven't started school, why my son still sleeps with me, why my house never seems to be completely clean...  Procrastination is why I am not who or where I want to be in life.
So here's what procrastinating less will bring me to doing:

  • I WILL start school.  As a matter of fact, I go tomorrow to register for my classes.  I want to make something of myself, and not be just a homemaker.  I love staying at home with my son, but at the end of the day, I am not happy.  I want to become a substance abuse counselor, and help people.  The first step to that is continuing my education.
  • I WILL be a better mother.  Not to say that I am a bad mom, but there are definitely areas that I want to improve on.  
  • I WILL worry more about myself and less about making other people happy.  By learning to say "no" every once in a while, I think that I could definitely find more time for myself and get to a point where I can actually make friends and learn how to not depend on what everyone thinks of me.
  • I WILL work on having a social life.  Right now, I spend all of my time at home, with my son.  It's great, because I have severe anxiety and this is my comfort zone.  It tends to get lonely though, when my fiance decides he wants to go out and even if I had a babysitter, I don't have anything to do.  
In all, I think these resolutions are definitely do-able.  I will be a happier, well-rounded person if I follow though with these and that is exactly what I need to be.  If not just for me, for my kids as well.  They need to see their Momma be a happy person, and that's what I want to be for them!

Friday, November 30, 2012

Updates

I know it has been a while since I've written on here, and boy have I missed it!  Things have been so crazy hectic that my brain decided that I wasn't allowed to sit and organize my thoughts.  So now here it is, 3:30am, with me wide awake and with a chance to sort everything out.

So a couple of new things are going on: I just found out I'm pregnant a couple of weeks ago, I'm working on potty training my little guy, and my step-daughter hates me.

Technically, I wasn't supposed to be able to get pregnant again.  Or, I guess I should say, my chances of getting pregnant were pretty slim.  Back in April, I had to have a cone biopsy on my cervix because of Carcinoma In Situ (girls, get your pap smears, get the HPV vaccine, and stay on top of it if you have an abnormal pap!) and the doctor removed quite a bit of my cervix.  He told me that due to scar tissue, my chances of getting pregnant were slim but carrying a baby full term would be really difficult.  I am 17 weeks along now and have to go in for an ultrasound soon to find out how serious this pregnancy will be.  My options seem to be bedrest, hormone shots to thicken my cervix, or my cervix being sutchered shut until 36 weeks.  Don't get me wrong, I am very excited to be having another baby, I'm just scared for mine (and his/her) well being.

Potty training has been going pretty good.  My little guy is so silly; every time he wets his diaper, he will tap his crotch to let me know.  I figured that was a pretty good sign that he knows whats going on, so we got him a potty chair (it's so cute, a green froggy potty) and he seemed to know exactly what to do when I set him on it.  So we've got peeing down, but #2 isn't working out yet.  No big deal, we just wait until after the morning poop to bring the potty chair out.  It's so cute, he's figured out how to take his diaper off now, so he will strip, sit and go, and then lay down in the floor immediately for me to wipe and re-diaper him.  It amazes me how smart he is.  I can't believe he'll be 2 next month, time goes so fast...

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

Choosing an Adult Halloween Costume

As an adult, it gets difficult to figure out what kind of Halloween costume you should go with.  Should you play it safe and stick with being a Disney Princess to match your 6 year-old or do you dare to explore the more sexy costumes?

I guess it comes down to what you plan on doing in your costume.  If you are going to an adult party, then you could definitely choose from the sexy costumes and be a French Maid or cheerleader.  However, if your plans are to only trick-or-treat with your kids, I would stay as chaste as possible and go for a scary witch or princess.

AnytimeCostumes.com provided me with one of their fantastic costumes to review, so I chose the Catnip Cutie.  I like that it is sexy, but still modest enough to wear out trick-or-treating with the kids.

First, I have to say, this costume is hot!  I love the style, and how well it fits.  The material of this outfit is durable and stretchy and the lace is gorgeous!  (It has a lace-ruffle bustle on the back, which I'm not going to show, but I LOVE IT!)  This is the kind of costume that will hold up for years.  They are very inexpensive as well.  This costume retails for under $30!

mee-ow!

To check out AnytimeCostumes.com adult line for men and women's costumes, and see their amazing prices, you can click this link.

Good luck, and have a great Halloween in 2012!


I received one or more of the products mentioned above for free using Tomoson.com. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will be good for my readers.

Monday, August 20, 2012

Italian Beef (Chicago-style)

This is one of my all time favorite foods.  Growing up in the south, we didn't have foods like this.  Every summer when I would visit my dad in Illinois, I would turn into a food connoisseur - tasting and enjoying everything we didn't have back home.  I ran across a recipe one day and discovered that it tastes just like Portillo's Italian Beef :)


Chicago-Style Italian Beef

Ingredients:
3 cups water
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon ground black pepper
1 teaspoon onion salt
1 teaspoon oregano
1 teaspoon garlic powder
1 teaspoon dried basil
1 teaspoon dried parsley
1 packet italian dressing mix
5 lb rump roast

In a medium saucepan over medium-high heat, combine the water and seasonings and bring just to a boil.
Put roast in crockpot and pour mixture over meat.  Turn on low setting and cook for 10-12 hours or high for 4-5 hours.  Shred meat and serve on italian rolls.


Sunday, August 19, 2012

A Bit About Me

A few lists to give you a better insight of who I am.  

Seven Things that Scare Me:

* Large crowds
* Driving/walking over bridges
* That pause in breathing babies do when they're sleeping that only lasts about 10 seconds but seems like eternity
* Spiders
* Snakes
* Hydroplaning
* Falling

Seven Things I Like:

* The smell of fresh rain on hot asphalt
* Cat pictures on the internet
* Talking about my kid
* Sleeping
* The moon
* Astrology
* The smell of french lavender

Seven Random Facts About Me:

* I won the spelling bee in 3rd grade
* I hate seafood but love canned tuna
* I love getting so absorbed in a book that it takes a few minutes for reality to come back
* I would totally hit on Gerard Butler or Jason Statham in front of my fiance, and he knows it
* I have many beliefs but am not religious in the conventional sense
* I am the most uncoordinated person in the world.  I can (and have) trip on the lines in linoleum 
* I hate being out in the sun

Seven Things I want to Do Before I Die:

* Write a book
* Raise my son to be an honest, loving man
* Visit Japan
* Learn HTML
* Become Self-Sufficient
* Drive a motorcycle
* Beat my anxiety

Seven Things I Can Do Well:

* Correct grammar mistakes (yes, I am a Grammar Nazi)
* Sleep
* Give advice 
* Bake
* Clean (although I don't like too)
* Snuggle
* Look at things in a realistic view

Seven Things I Can't Do But Wish I Could:

* Read minds
* Have an anxiety-free day out of the house
* Get my step-daughter to listen to me
* Teach my little guy to talk
* Have a full night's sleep
* Stop worrying
* Relax

Seven Phrases I'm Known to Use:

* Okee Dokee
* Be careful!
* It's up to you...
* Don't eat that!
* Cool Beans 
* Ugh!
* Fine.

Comment challenge time!
I want my readers to take one of these lists and comment with your "Seven."  It'll be fun to get to know you a little better!  This post will be open until midnight tonight where I will randomly (using random.org) select one commenter to win a $5 Amazon gift code! 
-only one comment per person, and must be a GFC follower to win! Good luck!