I want to be that perfect mom. The one that drives a minivan, brings their kids to playdates, does arts and crafts every day, bakes cookies, and still has time to make a three course meal and have a clean house. I want to do everything I see on Pinterest, and host dinner parties, and have people stop me to tell me how wonderful my children are. I want to be Super-Mom.
But I'm not.
Most days, I sit around in my pajamas pacing back and forth with a baby in my arms, a kid attached to my leg, and another one calling my name out over and over until I drop everything I'm doing to see another crappy drawing of a lady with "I love my mommy" on top. I resent those drawings. I'm not her mother, and she rubs it in every chance she gets. I am however mother to the other two who demand my constant attention and I still cant figure out how to divide my attention up enough to make all three of them happy.
My house stays semi-clean. There is clutter everywhere, but thanks to the two year old and his love of anything crumbly, I vacuum daily. The dishes are washed because I have a shortage of bottles and have to make sure they're cleaned for the baby. It doesn't smell and there isn't any bugs (aside from the occasional fly that makes it's way in through the front door.
I am not a crafty person. I can give myself second degree burns from a hot glue gun and after several gloopy messes, I gave up on even trying to make homemade play dough. Sammy loves to draw, so I'll pull out his table and give him some crayons - but after about ten minutes I have to run interference to keep him from drawing all over the walls.
I try to cook decent meals for my family, but with my constant attention having to be focused on the two littlest ones we end up eating a lot of frozen quick meals (Thank you Chicken Viola for making my life a little easier!)
My kids still seem happy and well rounded, so maybe I am still doing something right. Even when I feel like my life is upside down and I have accomplished nothing worth bragging about. So maybe it isn't them I am failing, but my idea of what a mom should be.
I'm not a mom, butt I am the second oldest of 5 and I helped raise my younger siblings. I'll tell you, that perfect mom is not a good mom. She's a mom that is too worried about being perfect to care about what her kids.
ReplyDeleteShe's worried about what others think of her. Your doing fine and just remember You have children who love you and there are people out there that wish they had what you have. :)
Hang in there! Being a mom is tough (I have two young girls) and I feel this way often. But then I realize that I can't and never will be the perfect mom. The exhausted mom with a messy house is usually the one doing it all right! ;)
ReplyDeleteI just found your blog and love it. This was the first post I read and felt like, finally someone else has these days and isn't afraid to say it. I hear from my husband (through his work) how many of those other moms are Super-Moms and just feel like I am ranking last. It was nice to read your last sentence.
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You are a Mom and there is NO perfect Mom. The most important thing to remember is loving your kids and showing them every single day. Even on days the house stays messy and you wear pajamas all day.. the kids still love you! That doesn't go away. Just stay strong and know you are not alone but don't strive for perfection, it won't happen. Take that time and put it into your relationship with your kids :)
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